Friday, January 25, 2008

Simple Things, Big Comfort

On and off (when I wasn't cutting my hair myself) for the last eight years, I've been going to Lam Lee, a stylist at the Potomac Yards Hair Cuttery.



I just have to say that it is SO nice to be able to get my hair cut the way I want, to have it cut well, and for a reasonable price.

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Getting Spun Right Round Baby Right Round

Watching today's news coverage of yesterday's Democratic presidential debate in South Carolina, I was saddened that so much emphasis is being placed on the clash between Clinton and Obama that what each might have actually said about the issues and where they stand was overshadowed. Then I realized that this has been the general pattern in the news for a while, not just after yesterday's events.

Talk about spin, whether you look at The Washington Post, The Nation, The Huffington Post, CNN, etc.

I don't know about others, but I'd rather base my vote on the candidate's own spin of themselves over others' spin of them.

Hillary Clinton's official campaign website

Barack Obama's official campaign website

(yeah, they are not the only ones vying for the Democratic nomination, but the only two I'd consider--didn't say you wouldn't find spin here, too!)

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

How much can one stand?

In so many areas of my life right now, the question of the day seems to be "How much can I stand?"

How does anyone ever answer this in a satisfying way? Maybe there is no satisfaction to be had...


Oh geez...I’m in too much of a pessimistic mood to be blogging!!!

Opposites

But I always heard opposites attract.
Yeah...But similars stay together.

(146) Rainbow Road Alex Sanchez

I wonder if anyone of us really knows “our type.” The kind of people I’ve almost always said that I was attracted to, by far, have NOT been the people that I’ve actually dated. Is this because I haven’t actually acknowledged all that I’m attracted to, that I’ve denied my “true” feelings? Or perhaps because I’ve waited to see who shows interest in me rather than initiating my own pursuits? Or because I’ve been too quick to form bonds and get attached to people based on the merit of what they have to offer, and not necessarily strictly based on my preconceived ideals? Maybe it’s all these things, and more.

In the end, I have no idea that actually finding the kind of people you believed you are attracted to even ensures a lasting relationship!

Promises and vows can be made, but they alone do not guarantee a relationship’s longevity. (Not that such longevity is a necessary common goal of all relationships everywhere.)

Most often times I’ve found that it’s the things I wasn’t looking for, the people I hadn’t anticipated meeting and getting to know, that often enrich my life most. This doesn’t mean, of course, that I’ve ceased my search to find out the ins and outs of how love works, only that I’ve met my share of frustration in that quest!

In my experiences, lack of sufficient similarities over time has led to break-ups. I guess the questions, then, are: What counts as a similarity? and How do you measure sufficiency?


Sometimes I forget that the answers aren’t as simple as they appear, and that objects can be closer than they appear.

Monday, January 14, 2008

More on the International Bill of Gender Rights

Last week, I posted the text of the International Bill of Gender Rights.

I stand by what I said in that earlier post, that more people could benefit from being familiar with it. That's not to say, however, that it itself is above critique and without its share of problematics.

Just wanted to pass along this page from Viviane K. Namaste's book, Invisible Lives: The Erasure of Transsexual and Transgendered People, that offers one such critique.


The book is definitely worth checking out...hopefully more on Namaste and Invisible Lives coming soon.

Blast from the past

I’m sitting here using a laptop handed down to me by my brother. It has an internal 28.8 modem that is compatible with a standard telephone dial-up connection, is operating on Windows 95, is loaded with Microsoft Word for Windows 95, and has an external 3.5” floppy drive. In other words, it’s a rather old computer. (Truth be told, it was already old when I got it in 2000.) But, it still works, and though the screen is probably only 8.5” x 6” and the battery is so worn out that it can’t hold a charge for more than a few minutes (if that), it still comes in handy.

I’m particularly amused because I had forgotten that I had set the screen saver to be scrolling text that reads “I am what I am.” In my high school yearbook, seniors were allowed the added privilege of including a quotation with their class picture. My quotation was, yes, you guessed it, “I am what I am.” I tried to also sneak in the phrase “Sea Tec Astronomy,” but that was eventually edited out. (It was the anagram from the film Sneakers that when unscrambled read “too many secrets.”) At the time, both of these things signified my queerness. I hadn’t really come out to anyone (barely even myself at this time), but I certainly knew that not being out didn’t necessarily mean that I wasn’t queer.

I feel the same way now about being trans. I never imagined that it would be as hard as it feels right now to come out as trans, especially since I’ve been out as queer for over a decade. I’m probably holding myself back more than anything or anyone else is. Still, in the end, I am what/who I am.

“F” is for Football and Friends!

These past several years, I’ll admit, I haven’t been watching a whole lot of football. When you’re living in Washington Redskins’ and Baltimore Ravens’ territory, but you’re a San Francisco 49er fan, and your team is struggling, there’s not much joy to be had. True, one of my good friends from the Bay Area who has since relocated to Baltimore goes to Ravens’ games in full 49ers gear, so maybe it’s just that I’m not hard core enough. *shrug*

This past season, however, I’m back in the game. The 49ers are still struggling, and I’m still in Redskins’ and Ravens’ territory. What’s different, however, is that “F” is for Football, AND for Friends—and I’ve had friends come into my life whose passion for football has rekindled my own.

Growing up having watched Joe Montana, Dwight Clark, Roger Craig, Jerry Rice, and so many other great players, it was easy to become a football fan. What really cultivated my fondness for the game weren’t the players, though, or even their Superbowl win, or their Repeat Superbowl Championship (though any ONE of these things would be sufficient, let alone the three combined!). I fell in love with the game because when I was growing up football season meant time with mom and dad. After church, followed by lunch at McDonalds, we’d get home and then curl up in their king-sized bed to watch football. Football was family time.

It’s been years since I watched football with my parents, and decades since they’ve had a king-sized bed. And, though not without regrets, it’s even been years since I’ve last seen my parents. But, as with many other queers, “family” includes so much more than my blood and marriage relatives.

So, here’s to the friends and the community—to the family—that I’ve been able to share this season with! Cheers y’all!!!

Thursday, January 10, 2008

Random Notes (pt. 2)

Random quotations more precisely, that I've collected watching my netflix discs:

If you could just give me the answers, I'd really appreciate it.
(Christina, Grey's Anatomy)

What you feel only matters to you. It's what you do to the people you say you love, that's what matters. It's the only thing that counts. Just do whatever it takes. You can't fail if you dont' give up.
(The Last Kiss)

It's not our job to appeal to the lowest common denominator, it's our job to raise it.
(President Bartlet, The West Wing, season 3, disc 1)

Monday, January 07, 2008

Internation Bill of Gender Rights

Though this is readily available on multiple internet sites, I wanted to pass it on, yet again. Besides, it's too good not to be everywhere!

THE INTERNATIONAL BILL OF GENDER RIGHTS

#1: The Right To Define Gender Identity

All human beings carry within themselves an ever-unfolding idea of who they are and what they are capable of achieving. The individual's sense of self is not determined by chromosomal sex, genitalia, assigned birth sex, or initial gender role. Thus, the individual's identity and capabilities cannot be circumscribed by what society deems to be masculine or feminine behavior. It is fundamental that individuals have the right to define, and to redefine as their lives unfold, their own gender identities, without regard to chromosomal sex, genitalia, assigned birth sex, or initial gender role.

Therefore, all human beings have the right to define their own gender identity regardless of chromosomal sex, genitalia, assigned birth sex, or initial gender role.

#2: The Right to Free Expression of Gender Identity

Given the right to define one's own gender identity, all human beings have the corresponding right to free expression of their self-defined gender identity.

Therefore, all human beings have the right to free expression of their self-defined gender identity; and further, no individual shall be denied Human or Civil Rights by virtue of the expression of a self-defined gender identity.

#3: The Right to Secure and Retain Employment and to Receive Just Compensation

Given the economic structure of modern society, all human beings have a right to train for and to pursue an occupation or profession as a means of providing shelter, sustenance, and the necessities and bounty of life, for themselves and for those dependent upon them; further, all human beings have the right to secure and retain employment and to receive just compensation for their labor regardless of gender identity, chromosomal sex, genitalia, assigned birth sex, or initial gender role.

Therefore, individuals shall not be denied the right to train for and to pursue an occupation or profession, nor be denied the right to secure and retain employment, nor be denied just compensation for their labor, by virtue of their chromosomal sex, genitalia, assigned birth sex, or initial gender role, or on the basis of a self-defined gender identity or the expression thereof.

#4: The Right of Access to Gendered Space and Participation in Gendered Activity

Given the right to define one's own gender identity and the corresponding right to free expression of a self-defined gender identity, no individual should be denied access to a space or denied participation in an activity by virtue of a self-defined gender identity which is not in accord with chromosomal sex, genitalia, assigned birth sex, or initial gender role.

Therefore, no individual shall be denied access to a space or denied participation in an activity by virtue of a self-defined gender identity which is not in accord with chromosomal sex, genitalia, assigned birth sex, or initial gender role.

#5: The Right to Control and Change One's Own Body

All human beings have the right to control their bodies, which includes the right to change their bodies cosmetically, chemically, or surgically, so as to express a self-defined gender identity.

Therefore, individuals shall not be denied the right to change their bodies as a means of expressing a self-defined gender identity; and further, individuals shall not be denied Human or Civil Rights on the basis that they have changed their bodies cosmetically, chemically, or surgically, or desire to do so as a means of expressing a self-defined gender identity.

#6: The Right to Competent Medical and Professional Care

Given the individual's right to define one's own gender identity, and the right to change one's own body as a means of expressing a self-defined gender identity, no individual should be denied access to competent medical or other professional care on the basis of the individual's chromosomal sex, genitalia, assigned birth sex, or initial gender role.

Therefore, individuals shall not be denied the right to competent medical or other professional care on the basis of chromosomal sex, genitalia, assigned birth sex, or initial gender role, when changing their bodies cosmetically, chemically, or surgically.

#7: The Right to Freedom From Involuntary Psychiatric Diagnosis and Treatment

Given the right to define one's own gender identity, individuals should not be subject to involuntary psychiatric diagnosis or treatment.

Therefore, individuals shall not be subject to involuntary psychiatric diagnosis or treatment as mentally disordered, dysphoric, or diseased, on the basis of a self-defined gender identity or the expression thereof.

#8: The Right to Sexual Expression

Given the right to a self-defined gender identity, every consenting adult has a corresponding right to free sexual expression.

Therefore, no individual's Human or Civil Rights shall be denied on the basis of sexual orientation; and further, no individual shall be denied Human or Civil Rights for expression of a self-defined gender identity through private sexual acts between consenting adults.

#9: The Right to Form Committed, Loving Relationships and Enter Into Marital Contracts

Given that all human beings have the right to free expression of self-defined gender identities, and the right to sexual expression as a form of gender expression, all human beings have a corresponding right to form committed, loving relationships with one another, and to enter into marital contracts, regardless of their own or their partner's chromosomal sex, genitalia, assigned birth sex, or initial gender role.

Therefore, individuals shall not be denied the right to form committed, loving relationships with one another or to enter into marital contracts by virtue of their own or their partner's chromosomal sex, genitalia, assigned birth sex, or initial gender role, or on the basis of their expression of a self-defined gender identity.

#10: The Right to Conceive, Bear, or Adopt Children; The Right to Nurture and Have Custody of Children and to Exercise Parental Capacity

Given the right to form a committed, loving relationship with another, and to enter into marital contracts, together with the right to express a self-defined gender identity and the right to sexual expression, individuals have a corresponding right to conceive and bear children, to adopt children, to nurture children, to have custody of children, and to exercise parental capacity with respect to children, natural or adopted, without regard to chromosomal sex, genitalia, assigned birth sex, or initial gender role, or by virtue of a self-defined gender identity or the expression thereof.

Therefore, individuals shall not be denied the right to conceive, bear, or adopt children, nor to nurture and have custody of children, nor to exercise parental capacity with respect to children, natural or adopted, on the basis of their own, their partner's, or their children's chromosomal sex, genitalia, assigned birth sex, initial gender role, or by virtue of a self-defined gender identity or the expression thereof.

Read more about the history, purpose and effect of the IBGR.<

Reuse-a-Shoe

Recently I've been learning about different kinds of recycling/donation options for various items. (We all need to do SO much better if we really want to lessen the damage we're doing to our environment.) Just found out about the "Reuse-A-Shoe" program by Nike.


Definitely a good alternative for those with lots of athletic shoes in need of an afterlife. Now, if I could only find something comparable for my casual shoes...

Sunday, January 06, 2008

Joke's on me

Just when I've been feeling really good about everything, I'm reminded that we have to live our lives in the real world.

Friday, January 04, 2008

Travels TO Pittsburgh

In my life on the east coast, I had passed THROUGH Pennsylvania on numerous occasions (on my way to Cleveland, OH and Frankenmuth, MI). In 2006 I did manage a day trip to Reading, PA to see the Keith Haring exhibit at the Reading Public Museum. But, other than that one quick sojourn, Pennsylvania has been a thruway and not a destination. (My friends can't believe that I've never even been to Philadelphia. I know, I know, such a shame considering how close it is to the DC metro area--it's on my list for "Things To Do in 2008.")

This past December, I finally traveled TO Pennsylvania, more specifically to Pittsburgh. I found it a charming city--full of history, character, and pride. Of course, being surrounded by so much water (even if it is river water and not ocean water) was a definite draw. I was most surprised by Pittsburgh's landscape--I had no idea there would be so many hills--it was wonderful. In many ways, the time I spent in Pittsburgh reminded me of some of the things I love most about San Francisco. (Even better, though, things were cheaper, there was less traffic, and parking was a breeze!)

It was a great way to close out 2007!

Some highlights from my trip:




as well as Spice Island, 5801 Video Lounge & Cafe, and The Strip, which didn't have business cards or other comparable take-away literature :(

Thursday, January 03, 2008

NYC, third time's the charm

The first time I went to NYC, I saw an all-star production of The Vagina Monologues at Madison Square Garden in celebration of V-Day 2001.

The second time I went to NYC was for the Queer Asian Pacific Legacy conference in 2004. One result of this conference was the National Gay and Lesbian Task Force's report on Asian Pacific American lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender people. This also marked my one and only trip to Keith Haring's Pop Shop, which has since closed its doors, and only recently has been resurrected on-line.

The third time I went to NYC was just this past December. I finally got the chance to see the usual tourist sights--corny I know, but memorable just the same. Here are some highlights...


Rockefeller Center



Times Square



Bryant Park



It was so worth the long walk in freezing temperature to catch the sunset while on the Brooklyn Bridge. I'm looking forward to a summer sunrise from the bridge...



Had the most FABULOUS dinner at Nobu!!



Goodnight NYC. Until next time!

It’s Still Elementary

Back at the end of November, I had the opportunity to be at the Washington D.C. premiere of It’s Still Elementary, a film by Groundspark (formerly known as Women’s Educational Media).

It’s Elementary: Talking About Gay Issues in School is often regarded by the students in my Introduction to Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender Studies course as one of their favorite films. Before watching the film, the students largely believe that K-12 is a bit early to start educating students about LGBT issues, but then quickly change their tune when they witness how teachers and students in It’s Elementary have successfully incorporated LGBT issues into their curriculum.

They’re amazed at how much the students depicted in the film are able to understand about regarding gay and lesbian issues, and equally surprised to find out how much misinformation students in K-12 settings have already been exposed to by media, peers, family, etc.

One of my critiques of It’s Elementary is that the film is completely silent on bisexual and transgender people’s issues. Granted, when the film was made, it was pushing the boundaries just talking about gay issues. In fact, to a large degree, to advocate teaching gay issues in K-12 education is still very much pushing the boundaries even today. I acknowledge this historic context of the film’s making, and make my critiques in the spirit very much in keeping with the film’s intent—to push the boundaries of acceptance, and attain respect for all.

It’s Still Elementary is a film that follows up with certain people from It’s Elementary. Celebrating the release of It’s Elementary on DVD for the first time, It’s Still Elementary is a special feature of the DVD on this, the film’s ten year anniversary. The film tracks down several people almost ten years later and asks them how their participation in the film has affected their lives. Juxtaposing their mid 1990’s selves with their present-day selves helps to demonstrate just how true the adage is that “the children are our future.”

Keeping this in mind, I wanted to share the following:

The Trouble With Islam (pt. 2)

Irshad Manji frames her book, The Trouble With Islam, as a letter to “fellow Muslims.” As a Catholic, there are many ways in which Manji isn’t addressing me, but I still took much from The Trouble With Islam. And, in fact, there are several moments when Manji does directly address the responsibilities of non-Muslims. While this certainly wasn’t her main focus, I definitely appreciate how The Trouble With Islam works to challenge Muslim and non-Muslims alike to be more reflexive about problems and struggles, and most importantly, to challenge us all to take actions to make the world better for us all.

The tone which Manji uses throughout her “letter” is somewhat of a casual/intimate one. It was almost as if I could “hear” her talking with me as I read her words on the page. Numerous passages demonstrate Manji’s wry sense of humor, her outrage at contradiction and injustice, and her dedication to her faith. In this way, The Trouble With Islam is crafted to reveal Manji to her readers on a personal level, and hence to foster her readers to feel similarly connected. (It also helps to make the book a quick read).

Although I wasn’t familiar with many of Manji’s references, to passages in the Koran, to Islamic customs and practices, to the nuances of conflict in the Middle East, etc. I found the text accessible. Manji offered a lot of knowledge to those, like me, who have only a rudimentary understanding of Islam and Muslim culture. Yet, at the same time, I’m confident that fellow Muslims would also find the text to offer them valuable insight to Islam. In her own quest to understand Islam, Manji describes the struggles she faced, as well as the conclusions she came to. Far from insisting that readers come to the same conclusions, she instead presents her findings for others’ to consider and evaluate for themselves. Indeed, it is individuality that Manji proposes as the guiding value that will move us all forward to a better world—not the kind of individuality that is selfish, but the kind that prizes our infinite differences and ultimate uniqueness. As she writes, the differences among us should serve as “incentives to know one another.”

Manji’s argument here is clear: once we truly respect this level of individuality, the plurality of interpretations which she is so keen to facilitate and support as the means to end the “trouble” with Islam, becomes that much more attainable.

Wednesday, January 02, 2008

The Trouble With Islam

I finally made the time to sit and read Irshad Manji's book, The Trouble With Islam. I was initially drawn to the book after having attended a lecture of Manji's. After reading it, I've found it to resonate with so much of what I teach, and what I'm trying to write for my own dissertation. I'm hoping that tomorrow, after I've had the night to let it sink it, I'll do a little dissertation freewriting about it...

In the mean time, as usual, some of my favorite passages:

Manji, Irshad. The Trouble With Islam: A Muslim’s Call For Reform in Her Faith. Canada: Random House Canada, 2003. U.S. ed. New York: St. Martin’s Press, 2004.

(9) Lord, I loved this society. I loved that it seemed perpetually unfinished, the final answers not yet known—if ever they would be. I loved that, in a world under constant renovation, the contributions of individuals mattered.

(20-21) Praise Allah for the Internet. With the Web making self-censorship irrelevant—someone else is bound to say what you won’t—it became the place where intellectual risk-takers finally exhaled. They reasserted what makes the West a fierce if imperfect incubator of ideas: its love of discovery, including discovery of its [end page 20] own biases.

(32) When imitation goes mainstream, most of us fail to explore our prejudices—or even acknowledge that we have any. We believe what we’re supposed to believe, and that’s that.

(36) We all have agendas, some more equal than others.

(40) Endemic to that exercise is God’s other motive for creating various peoples: so we’ll feel an incentive to know one another. It’s as if the Creator intended us to use difference as an icebreaker rather than as an excuse to retreat into opposite corners.

(55) Recognizing that a frenzy of innovative thought can trigger moral confusion, Maimonides wanted Jews to retain sound scriptural principles without dumbing themselves down. This snippet from The Guide for the Perplexed demonstrates his intellectual honesty: “[I]t is in the nature of man to like what he is familiar with and in which he has been brought up, and that he fears anything alien. The plurality of religions and their mutual intolerance result from the face that people remain faithful to the education they received.”

(59) These scholars benefited from patronage and weren’t about to chirp an ode to openness when their masters wanted harsher lyrics.

(155) When people are indoctrinated to believe that any aspect of the founding moment is sacred, then the faith is destined to become static, brittle, inhumane.

(181) Why, over the past one thousand years, has the entire Arab world translated only as many books as Spain translates every year? Is it because the more people know about foreign notions, the more likely they’ll be to examine their own?

(185) Generating wealth is crucial to sustaining any new democracy because only a business class that can be taxed by the state will, in turn, compel the state to develop institutions that respond to people.

(186) Meanwhile, one more group is poised to demonstrate the possibilities of reforming Islam: Muslims in the West. We have the luxury of exercising civil liberties, especially free expression, to change tribal tendencies. Are we leveraging that freedom? Are enough non-Muslims challenging us to do so?

(188) Civilization is built by the artist, by the literary exponent, by the ability to generate beauty and music and new methods of expression.

(199) Amin Maalouf, a novelist in France, nails the point: “Traditions deserve to be respected only insofar as they are respectable—that is, exactly insofar as they themselves respect the fundamental rights of men and women.”

(200-201) I propose that, as a guiding value, we in the West agree on individuality. When we celebrate individuality, we let most people [end page 200] choose who they are, be they members of a religion, free spirits, or both.

(203) Our global responsibility now is not to determine who owns what identity, but to convey to future generations what we all owe each other.


Want more: go to Irshad Manji's website.

Looking Back, Moving Forward

I’ll admit, I love making new year’s resolutions. (I love it even more when I stick to them!). Making resolutions is an opportunity for me to stop and contemplate what I want in my life, and to identify things I need to do to get what I want. As I mentioned to a friend yesterday, new year’s shouldn’t be the ONLY time we do such reflexive work, but it does provide a convenient moment to do so.

Years ago, I looked at my life and realized that so much time had passed that I could no longer account for-—names, events, places forgotten. I started this blog, in part, to help me remember those things. (This is why I haven’t updated to a newer template-—I like how this old one marks the time.) I soon realized that it also gave me a great outlet to keep in touch with myself, and potentially get in touch with others. (Hello readers!)

December was a busy month, so I’ve got some catch-up posts to do, then it’s on with what this new year brings.

Cheers!